I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
Actually going to jail after your wedding is NOT part of the plan.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
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