i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
