If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
