Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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