Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
She even gives head with a lisp.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
