atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
