How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Successfully pulled the houdini tonight. Check that off my list.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
My kid made a secret wish that you have a baby... Make good choices today!
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
Randomize
