you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Randomize
