Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
You ate ashes out of my bong
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Randomize
