it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
