awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
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