Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Randomize
