were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
WHY THE FUCK IS MY BATH TUB FILLED WITH MUD?!
1. You were drunk 2. You wanted a mud bath\n3. We tried to talk you out of it, but you kept throwing dirt at us
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
