all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
Randomize
