he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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