I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Hey just to warn you theres a really fat guy passed out in front of our front door snoring. Don't touch him, he's in god's hands now.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Randomize
