that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
where does the pee come out of this thing
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
My drunken abilities have only improved since college....I can navigate the streets of chicago like no ones business, do push-ups to hail a taxi and instantly become an mma fighter after 3 shots of hennessy
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
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