Grow some girl-balls and come out already
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I hate college football. It's really fucking with our phone sex schedule.
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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