Whod you bang
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
