I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Randomize
