So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Woke up on the floor with my glow stick in one hand & dollar bills in the other. Good. Morning.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I'm sobbing to NWA
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize