this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I don't know the quality of the hand jobs you've received in the past but it CLEARLY was not one from me
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize