so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize