I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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