if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Yes, he did use his cock to direct traffic from my 3rd story window. That's why I love him
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Randomize
