She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize