No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
