how do flat chested girls get laid?
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
So basically, I've just woken up in another random bed and I go to get my pants and he's wearing them. Like my underwear is in them... What the fuck is wrong with my life?
I've started brushing my teeth at 6pm, because honestly alcohol is the only thing I consume after that
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize
