Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
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