PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
Randomize
