how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
Randomize
