Duck Duck Cougar?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
