There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
2020 sucks, I want a refund
Randomize
