I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
it's great music for shaving your balls
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
I deserve this hangover.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
