Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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