You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
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