It's like a parade of train wrecks.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
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