You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Sorry about blasting sandstorm on a loop when i left for work this morning. But maybe this will teach you to not come home trashed on a tuesday night with some chick and have loud sex till 4 in the morning. The walls are thin, remember?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize
