awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I feel like a drive thru vagina
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
