Apparently you make a good broom.
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Life lesson learned last night, if you are too drunk to use the atm leave the strip club
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
