Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
the wedding party just walked in to the song eye of the tiger. i'm getting drunk.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
