"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Dude, can't find my socks anywhere....
Yeah, you took a shit in the harbor off a wall, used them to wipe. I'm sure they're still on the beach somewhere if you really want them back
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
