it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
Randomize
