Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm too high and old for this...
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
