i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Randomize
