Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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