I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Accidentally donated half a joint to Kiwanis with the spare change from my car's ashtray. I hope those kids appreciate it.
I need a beard to bite.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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