dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
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