Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
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