Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Randomize
