I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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